Omaha couple offers hope and a wealth of experience to engaged couples

When Judie Jones was engaged to be married, she attended one evening of marriage preparation. Her soon-to-be husband was in Vietnam, so she went by herself.

“What I remember about the evening is that a doctor talked, a banker talked and a priest talked. I wasn’t impressed. I’m sorry,” Judie said.

Judie’s husband, Dick, would return from Vietnam five days before the couple was married at Holy Name Parish in Omaha on August 10, 1968. His marriage preparation involved speaking with a priest for about an hour.

Judie and Dick, members of Holy Cross Parish in Omaha, both grew up in faithful Catholic families with parents whose marriages were strong and happy. They had no reason to believe their marriage wouldn’t be the same.

More than fifty years and seven children later, the couple are indeed happily married. But that wasn’t always the case.

Judie and Dick struggled early in their marriage. They found it challenging to communicate. Dick had a temper and didn’t have the tools to deal with his anger. Following the birth of their fourth child, Judie moved out. They reconciled a short time later, and both were committed to making the marriage work. Things got better, but they still had issues.

In June 1974, the couple attended a Worldwide Marriage Encounter at Creighton University. There, they finally learned what it took to create a loving, holy and healthy marriage.

The weekend had such a profound impact on the Joneses that they wanted to make sure others would have the same experience. In January 1977, the first Catholic Engaged Encounter (CEE) – based on the model of Worldwide Marriage Encounter – came to Blair and the couple sat in on it. In March of that year, they presented at a CEE weekend and have been involved in the organization ever since. Today, they serve as local coordinators for CEE.

“We saw great value in helping couples get a head start for marriage by addressing issues together before marriage,” Judie said. “We wanted them to have the aids we wished we had received before our marriage.”

CEE weekends provide engaged couples with an in-depth, private, personal marriage preparation experience within the context of Catholic faith and values.

“Couples also benefit from the lived experience of two married couples and a priest as the teachings of our Church are integrated throughout weekend presentations,” Judie said. “They benefit from the opportunity to be with other couples who are also getting married and possibly establish new relationships with like-minded couples, which, in turn, can provide the support and encouragement they will need as newlyweds.”

The couple continued giving presentations to engaged couples at CEE weekends, but after their seventh child was born, they stepped back and worked behind the scenes.

When another couple later challenged them to “jump back in” to presenting at CEE weekends, they had some reservations about whether young couples could relate to an older married couple.

Those fears were allayed by a priest friend who worked with CEE.

“He told us, ‘Young couples need role models, they need hope. You can provide that hope,’” Judie said.

In today’s increasingly secular society, where young people have few examples of what a healthy and holy marriage looks like, such hope is desperately needed.

According to data from Georgetown University’s Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate, Catholic marriage rates dropped by about 70% between 1969 and 2019.

Judie and Dick believe the more work a couple does before they marry, the better prepared they will be for married life.

They hope other married couples will answer the call to bring hope to young people. According to Judie, CEE’s number one need “is workers in the field – couples and priests who believe in the value of sacramental marriages and sense a call to serve in this area.”

For their part, the things the couple learned at their Worldwide Marriage Encounter weekend so many years ago still hold true. They try to pass that wisdom on to couples attending CEE weekends.

“Marriage isn’t a contract,” Dick said. “It’s a covenant between a man and a woman and God. And just like Holy Orders, it is a vocation of service. Not just service to each other, but to go out and serve others as a couple.”

More information on CEE weekends or how to volunteer with the organization can be found here.

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